Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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