My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
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