My nipple is on Facebook.
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Randomize
