no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
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