physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
Randomize