she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
