I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
Randomize
