umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Randomize
