i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
Randomize
