chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
Randomize
