what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
Randomize
