fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Randomize