Whoa Z and x make the same sound
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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