Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
FUCK WHALES
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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