That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
Randomize
