i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
Randomize
