chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
Randomize
