glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
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