im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize