I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
Randomize
