I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Randomize
