My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Randomize
