tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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