don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
