If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Randomize