Christians are straight up FREAKS
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
