So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
Will exercising make me less horny?
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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