Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
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