This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
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