the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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