Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
