A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
Randomize
