Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
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