Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Randomize
