think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize