At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
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