nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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