Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
