i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
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