so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
Randomize
