just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
Randomize
