Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
Randomize
