HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
