I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
fuck your aforementioned shoe
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
