Eric just called. Says he's trapped in a cul de sac because the road disappeared. Wants me to tell him what street has the bushes that whisper sweet nothings into you ear and the wobbling purple pokemon. Oh, and a "bigger and better" penis is growing out of his belly button. He took shrooms by the way.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
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