he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
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