Having a random hookup so left but love u
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
