hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
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