my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
Randomize
