You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
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