The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
And then the night went full on bisexual.
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Randomize
