that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
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