found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
Randomize